Oh, I was born in Glasgow, 

near the centre of the town.

I'd take you there and show you,

but the trains are cancelled, 

the planes are grounded,

the roads have closed, 

the buses are all over the place,

and when the do arrive they are mobbed,

the pavements are like ice,

everyone wants a taxi,

the schools are closed,

the shops are shut coz no-one can get to work,

the pipes have burst,

and it's -10 and cold enough to turn off your freezer.

Oh, I am stuck in Glasgow.